Keith: "make a phoenix-pig!"
Me: "Keith, there's no such thing as a phoenix-pig."
Keith: "There's no such thing as a phoenix!"
Me: "Touche!"

keith: "ciara gave up show biz just because of some stupid movie called 'baby killer'."
me: "why?"
keith: "because she wanted the baby to come back to life by magic but i decide what happens and i said the baby should stay dead forever. so she gave up show biz!"

"If your nose starts bleeding, it means you're picking it too much. Or, not enough." -Chief Wiggum

little Keith: "Fuck means things dump all over the place. Fuck means, people make a mess ( Read more... )

On King of the Hill, Peggy Hill wanted to go to this concert on Mother's Day. Hank said that they already had plans, and in reply Peggy said: "Well, it's *my* day! I should be able to do what I want ( Read more... )

Me: (pointing to Keith A.'s right nipple) What's this?
Keith: a booger.
Me: nooo, it's not a booger! What is this?
Keith: Ting-kunk. (His word for something he can't identify)
Me: nooo. It's your nipple, silly head!
Keith: (triumphantly) nipple-silly-head!